Goodbye little one..

So many sweet memories in between the last post... sweet time with my nephew Caden and sis in Tulsa, sweet times starting school, sweet times with friends in Dallas, sweet time with sis-in-law making tinctures, but by far the sweetest... was one I never got to post about because I was trying to keep it a surprise.

So here it goes...we got a beautiful surprise in the middle of August that we were pregnant. I was excited because the Lord had changed my heart to meet His (and my husbands). It is almost impossible for me to keep sweet gifts like that a surprise because they are such miracles.
I never knew I would find so much joy in sharing that surprise with my girls but they were ecstatic to become big sis's again! (and for Abbey first time big sis). We had names for a boy or a girl and for us to come up with a name that quick is a miracle too!

We got another surprise on September 20th! There was no beautiful heartbeat on my sweet little one. We tried to wait hoping in the Lord to work another miracle...only to find out the same thing a week later and then a week after that. It is still crazy to me that the life inside me is gone and as a sweet friend said never to be met on this side of Heaven. I have so many different emotions it is at times difficult to sort through them and not just ignore them (which I think is my tendency) !

We have been super blessed with some wonderful fellowship of believers who have gone through this numerous of times. I feel blessed to only have experienced this once thus far. Wes and I more now than ever see the Sovereignty of the Lord and the provision of children He gives us! Some children we get to raise and care for while on earth and some we never even get to hold but love no less.

This post is more for me but I wanted to be able to remember how much I loved this little one already! I love you sweet baby and am so thankful that I got to rejoice with my family and friends in my discovery of you! It is such a strange feeling to say goodbye........